Back by popular demand!

Ok, so not really, but I can’t resist compiling these lists! They are oddly cathartic to me.

Before I became a parent, I had never really given these comments a thought. And why would I??? I had not yet found myself in this world.

But now that I am here…it is inescapable. THE COMMENTS ARE EVERYWHERE.

So, without further ado, I give you…

What NOT To Say To Anyone…Especially a Pregnant Woman

10. Are you pregnant/when are you due? First of all, NEVER assume someone is pregnant. She may be quite obviously pregnant…she may have just given birth…she may just be round. Never assume. You just make an ass out of you and me. WAIT until she brings up the topic, then proceed with caution.

9. Wow, you look tired. Why, yes, I’m growing a human and that requires a lot of energy, thank you. A pregnant woman could look like a hot mess caught in a trash compactor on a rainy day. NEVER make a negative comment about her appearance. She’s either glowing or beautiful or you say nothing at all.

8. You look like you have your hands full! This comment actually doesn’t bother me one bit but I have friends for whom this is like nails on a chalkboard. If she looks like she could use a hand, offer one. Otherwise, keep it moving.

7. Wow, you’re big. Are you sure you’re not having twins? With both of my pregnancies, I showed early (then again, my body type is shaped that way to begin with. I’m not being self-deprecating, I’m being serious). During my pregnancy with Nugget, the same healthcare professional said this to me so many times that I quit going. I felt so self conscious! 

Don’t let anyone make you feel like that. If you’re the size of a house the way I was, rock it, girl! 

6. Awww, you’re so tiny. One of my friends was constantly told this and she said it made her feel self conscious too…like something was wrong with her baby or that she/he wasn’t developing properly. Again, if you’re going to comment on a pregnant mama’s body…JUST DON’T. Keep it simple. “You look beautiful.” The end.

5. Oh my God, your hormones are making you crazy! Um, no, your incredibly unwise words just did and now I will stab you in the eye with a fork. Kidding! But seriously, don’t tell a pregnant mama anything about her hormones. She’s aware that they’re there. Trust me.

4. When are you going to have another one? I have to say, I am guilty of this one. Loooooong before I became a mama or went through infertility or realized you just don’t need to ask. If the info is offered up, great. 

3. Are you going to keep trying until you have a boy/girl? Again, information such as this is on a need-to-know basis and most people (other than mommy and daddy) don’t need to know this.

2. Are you seriously going to eat all of that? Cardinal rule #1 of pregnancy: Thou shalt not comment on what mama eats. Actually, this should probably be a cardinal rule of marriage/dating too, am I right??

1. Aw man, WHY wasn’t it a boy/girl???? Are you disappointed? So this happened to me today and I am still in a bit of shock. Maybe it’s my hormones but this comment just BUGGED the heck out of me. Baby #2 is a girl and we could not be more thrilled. I just don’t even know what to say to this comment. (So I didn’t say anything.) 

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Hope you enjoyed today’s installment. Until next time!

What Not To Say To Anyone...Especially a Pregnant Woman